I guess it’s easy to see that I believe people can be empaths. Plenty of folks out there think empaths are some New-Age label for people expressing empathy & it’s total crap, but in the same paragraph they’ll mention someone they consider a narcissist (versus saying they have narcissistic tendencies, go figure).

I have been suspected to be an empath (or have very strong empathetic tendencies for those who don’t want to give the label), so when I was at my most depressed and frustrated trying to navigate my social world, I picked this book up. I waited a while to read it, but figured while I’m on this journey of health and self-discovery, it was about time I read it.

And I’m glad I did. I will say there’s a lot that I won’t take away from this (I don’t know anything about “shamanistic healing” that’s mentioned on a couple of pages, but 95% of the book is very useful for the average person, with or without a spiritual side).

Ora North’s words are a breath of fresh air in a sea of self-help resources that want us to focus on the overly positive. Human beings are made of both light and dark, and pushing aside the dark, hurts, childhood traumas, etc. and pretending they don’t exist doesn’t help anyone, ESPECIALLY empaths. Empaths need to re-charge and be able to help themselves in order to help others, because otherwise they get lost, burned out, and/or become cynical and destructive because they can’t tune out the rest of the world.

This book has a lot of great ideas for what an empath can do when they’re tired of being an empath because the negativity has worn them down over time, or (like me) they’re so used to feeling everyone else’s feelings that they don’t even know what they want or feel anymore (which makes it easy to get stuck when trying to make decisions because they’re used to filtering what they want through other folks’ feelings or opinions… which sucks). Several pages are about building positive relationships and recognizing (or what happens when you fail to recognize) the energy vampires in your life, dealing with narcissists and others who would use your caretaking nature against you, and family and friends who won’t appreciate the boundaries you try to set up to keep yourself healthy.

There’s a segment at the end of each chapter giving tips on how to use what’s been learned, the questions you need to ask yourself and reflect on, etc. They’re not simple things that’ll take 5 minutes, but deep-dives that means I’ll be referring back to this book often.

If you struggle with your empathetic tendencies and dealing with others because of them (or consider yourself an empath that feels lost about yourself), then I think this is a pretty good resource to consult.

I decided to review this book for this blog because I noticed my tendency to suborn my own opinions in the face of opposition or if their emotions were coming through loud and clear (I hinted at this reality in this post). As I progress on a path that will lead to better health and drastic changes in my life, I know I’m gonna face opposition from those who know me best, or face ridicule or unwanted attention from other people as well. I figured it would be a great time to get some tools in my toolbox to deal with the negativity without cowering or going quiet as I have in the past and let the criticism wear me down and derail my efforts. I can’t live that way anymore.