When this book calls it a “practical guide”, it pretty well means it. Dr. Walton’s book is about finding the skills to understand others, understand yourself, and be able to communicate better. It operates on the basic idea that we can’t fully divorce ourselves from emotion, that we’re social creatures and there is a bit of emotion in every interaction.

Learning to read others’ cues and body language can promote better communication, help you understand where they are going in a conversation, and give the tools to learn from and teach others because you are able to discern more than the surface level actions. It also talks about how to really listen to yourself and handle your own emotions in the face of misbehavior or in case of bad days.

This is not a workbook, and it’s structured to simplify things with some workbook elements. There is plenty to read about, and then summation areas to help with unfamiliar terms or concepts, and a few questions or quizzes to see where you’re at in your emotional intelligence.

I think it’s a good resource, but not a mind-blowing one. If you’ve done much reading as far as self-help topics goes, then a lot of what is in those pages is not going to be unfamiliar at all. It’s more the rather friendly, well-divided presentation that makes me recommend this for those who are socially inept (like me) or tend to misread others’ intentions or emotions (again, me) that makes it worth checking out. There are plenty of small topics to consult and you could probably skip around and be fine.

I’d recommend it to anyone who tends to get some foot-in-mouth syndrome going on, or has trouble reading others’ cues or discerning their emotional states during or before conversation. They’d probably be the most needed recipients of a book like this, but anybody who struggles with dealing with emotions or interpersonal issues could use it.

Why I had to read this now…

I read this book at this time because of my empathetic tendencies getting in the way of really seeing what’s going on. I’m either too invested in others and ignoring my own feelings, or too overwhelmed with my own feelings being intertwined with situations that I lack the attention needed to help someone or have positive communication with another person.

I need to work on my situational awareness, my interpersonal awareness, and how to not go into nervous babbling mode when I get excitable and get the gist of the cues folks are giving off. My cluelessness has gotten me in some trouble in the past, and I’d rather slow down and be clear versus irritating.